The Real Reasons You Should Go to WHIP

All you politics majors, I know you’ve read the brochure the school puts out for WHIP. I’m positive you attended all of Dr. Bobb’s little informational meetings. I know that you want to put on your resume “Go-fer for Ted Cruz, OMG.” D.C. is basically your paradise. While I’m sure all of your reasons are valid, let me give you the skinny about the actual benefits of going to WHIP.

For one, don’t go unless you are 21. Trust me. Bar life here makes Broad Street look like the Congo’s worst bar. Shots, shots, shots for days. And nice people to buy them for you (men excluded from this benefit I suppose).

Do you feel like you and your closest friends could really use some quality time? Guess what: you will have no one else to pick from for an entire semester. That’s right. You eat, sleep, breath, and take classes with same 15 people. Either you will be soul mates with these people by the end of semester, or you will want them all dead.

Sick of Saga? Well WHIP means no Saga for a semester. Unfortunately, this means you have to live off your own cooking. Although I would rather use my kitchen for something like clothing storage, I do appreciate the microwave and refrigerator because I basically live off Lean Cuisines and Chipotle. Oh wait? Did I mention Chipotle is a block away? Yes, yes it.

Want a boyfriend or girlfriend to share stories about your horrible boss? Don’t come to WHIP. Unless you want to date some yuppie, stuck-up staffer, stay at Hillsdale. Everyone there wants to date and get married and the whole shtick. Already found “the one”? Install google hangout or skype ASAP.

Do you enjoy shopping? There are malls and shopping galore in D.C. Feel like buying a new dress at ZARA? Ride the metro two stops. Is Forever 21 more your style? Three metro stops. Do you want the feeling of walking through a mall, buying a slurpee and a pretzel, and visiting like 50 stores and maxing out your credit card? Pentagon City is a 20 minute metro ride. And it's the best. There is a Panera, Starbucks, and Chipotle in their food court!

More importantly, did you have a rough semester? Did you take Jackson, Gamble, and Sommerville in the same semester? Your GPA looks pretty rough, huh? Well then WHIP is the place for you! While we do get a lot of reading, it’s super interesting and manageable. And you get an A for your internship. That’s basically like a solid A in two regular Hillsdale Classes. Boom.

Also, without a ton of homework, you can do whatever you want. Feel like going to a museum? You can! Want to get drunk on a Tuesday? Totally an option. Want to watch a movie and curl into bed at 8:30 or watch the entire Sex and the City series? No one will judge you.

Oh yes, the college’s selling point: the internship. As a seasoned interned, I will tell you all internships basically suck. Most likely you will be picking up someone’s lunch or filing or making calls or running around like a crazy person, not writing legislation for the next presidential candidate in the Senate or the front page article for National Review. But having an internship is fun for other reasons. You get to do things you would never had the opportunity to do at Hillsdale. You get to see what life is like post-graduation. And of course, you get some real-life job experience.

So what are you waiting for? Sign up and join the league of Whipsters.